"Easter is just like Christmas in the summer"
(said to a lady celebrating her 44th birthday) "you sound sweet old lady"
" If you want present for your mother in law then this would be great, but with much higher voltage"
"the perfect marriage is between a blind man & a dumb woman"
[LAMBED] "A big ship giving birth to a little ship"
"I'm blonde, I'm not English!"
"vat is ze verd?"
"E for Apple?"
"C for coconuts" [whilst leaning right up to the camera!]
"even divorced people could vin that money"
"God loves everyone, except Osama bin Laden"
"there are rich people, and there are people with money"
"you eat healthy, you exercise, and you die anyvay, so vats ze point?"